I went to a parenting class today, it was great, surrounded by all my new neighbors that I hardly know sharing and talking about feelings....I hate feelings.
(Yeah sarcasm was frowned upon too, by the way - one more check against natalie)
sometimes I feel like such a guy, I don't want to sit and talk about how this or that made me feel bad; or if I DO go to someone for advice, I want suggestions. I want you to help me see the other person's point of view, don't tell me you "understand" that I feel "____". It is patronizing to me. I have subscribed to the 'just fix it or forget it' mentality. Feelings can take over your life if you let them. That's where depression, and anxiety attacks come from. Don't get me wrong, I still get upset, but I don't see the benefit from dwelling in it too long.
But here I am in this class learning that I need to be a better listener, to validate my childs feelings more and help them to feel that emotion is ok, it's acceptable, it's normal. They were right. I sometimes get so caught up in my "no victim mentality" parenting style... I forget...they have feelings. And they(at least not yet) don't hate them.
I think God sent me crazy, passionate kids to remind me to stop...and feel. Sometimes it's not about getting something done, or solving a problem...
thank goodness for neighborhood parenting classes...with neighbors I don't know. Of course it would be nicer if I was surrounded by people who knew me...and don't think I'm completely nuts... oh well I guess they'd learn the truth eventually... :)
1 comment:
hey I am sooooo sorry I never got back to you about preschool! I just went to call you back and can't find your number! ugggggh! so please email me---qberrys@hotmail.com and I'll try to give you some ideas!! the finishing of the basement is about to do me in!! Hope all is well with you!! Oh and our family motto this year is "toughen up" so I like your "no victim mentality"!! that's why we are friends! hee hee!
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